Monday, October 24, 2011

Recovering from Pet Loss part 1

I've been doing a lot of research online and looking for ways to deal with pet loss, specifically pet loss that carries a lot of guilt.

Euthanasia is the king of guilt. I'm pretty sure that no one makes that decision and walks away guilt free, even if it was what was best for the pet involved.

One of the things that was suggested for me, was to make a list of all the ways that I made Alaska happy/ spoiled etc.

1) Alaska loved to lay in the sun on the grass and I indulged her every chance I got.

2) Alaska loved to ride in the truck, so I took her everywhere with me.

3) We took Alaska on long and short road trips.

4) Even though Alaska was on a prescription diet, I still fed her things that she loved... like French Fries.

5) We bought Alaska orthopedic beds... a lot of them. The more uncomfortable she got, the more we tried to find beds that would make her more comfortable. In the end, she had a bed in every room.

6) I talked to Alaska quite a bit... and I payed her a lot of attention.

7) I snuggled Alaska a lot and I pet her every chance that I got. I feel certain that she didn't feel ignored.

8) I loved playing with her when she was well enough. Usually it would consist of me gently ruffling her fur and her swatting at me with her front paws.

9) Everyone that passed through my house, loved on and doted on Alaska. I made sure of it.

10) I made sure that Alaska had chew toys... even though she only had like one tooth, she loved raw hides!

In general, I doted on Alaska. I made sure that if she wanted or needed anything, she had it. I spent so much of my time taking care of her, loving her, petting her etc that I'm not even sure what to do with my time now.  It's weird not having her here making her little bleating lamb noises and waddling along after me as I cross from room to room. It's weird not calling for her when I get home. Or not putting her in the truck with me when I run to the post office or go for a weekend at my Grandmother's house. Even not having her sleeping on the rug outside of my shower or laying in the hallway in front of the door... it's just odd not having her here.

Isn't it crazy how much one small, elderly eskie can make such a huge difference in your life?

Sweet Tea and Cookie's, Ya'll!
The Still Grieving,
Mrs. Belle


Ipod Must Haves!

Okay, to take a break from my sadness over the passing of my little dog and to give my readers a break from my weeping, I am updating my Ipod today.

Over the past few weeks, I have been keeping a list of songs that I like on my phone. So, I thought that I should post some of the songs that I'm crazy over right now.

Note: I'm a country music fan... so be warned! :) Though, I do have quite a few NON country must haves such as:

I love you like a love song- Selena Gomez
Party Rock Anthem- LMFAO
Jet Lagged- Simple Plan

I absolutely LOVE cranking 'Party Rock Anthem' in my Titan... AWESOME!

Now, on to my country loves:
Rise Up- Jeff Bates
Friends with Tractors- Rodney Atkins
Somebody's Chelsea- Reba Mcentire
Hell on Heels- Pistol Annie's
Love you Through it- Martina McBride
Underdog- The Lost Trailers
He's Mine- Rodney Atkins
Why Don't we just Dance- Josh Turner
I love you this big- Scotty Mcreery
The Trouble with Girls- Scotty Mcreery
There you have it- Blackhawk
Take it off- Joe Nichols
Going through the Big D- Mark Chesnutt
Love Done Gone- Billy Currington
Don't Close your eyes- Keith Whitley
Keep on Loving you- Steel Magnolia
Are you Gonna kiss me or not- Thompson Square
Home- Dierks Bentley
Like my Dog- Billy Currington
For Pete's Sake- Jason Matthews (TEAR JERKER!)
Red Solo Cup- Toby Keith
Storm Warning- Hunter Hayes
Shake it for me- Luke Bryan
Crazy Being Home- Mark Wills
Camouflage- Brad Paisley
Wanna take you home- Gloriana

And the number one song that I MUST HAVE on my Ipod ASAP?

'Remind Me' by Brad Paisley featuring Carrie Underwood.


What songs are you all craving right now?

Sweet Tea and Cookie's, Ya'll!
Mrs. Belle


Saturday, October 22, 2011

Hang in There Followers!

... my blog is not always this sad and depressing.

It will pick up as soon as I stop grieving.

Hang in there.

Sweet Tea and Cookie's, Ya'll!
Mrs. Belle


Happy Birthday to Me...

Today is my 24th Birthday and... it feels just like every other day.

Isn't it odd that after your 21st Birthday, you don't really have another milestone until you're 40? Birthdays in between them just kind of... pass. I miss being able to have a big birthday party with cake and presents and all my childhood friends. Now we are all so different that it would be odd if we were all in the same room again for a party.

But remember how awesome childhood birthday parties were? Pinatas, games, a table full of presents? And then, you reach an age where you want to be 'grown up' and have 'grown up' parties... like boy/girl parties, co-ed sleepovers, alcohol...

Then you get 'grown up' and you want your childhood parties back. Back when you didn't have to plan it, worry about who will get along with who, who will pay for what, etc etc.

Where is the fun?

My Mom and my sisters are coming up tonight and my friend bought me a cake. Mr. Belle gets to leave the armory 2 hours early. So, I will have family here and a few friends and I'm sure we will have fun. A little shopping, dinner, cake.

Maybe for just a little while, I can stop thinking about Alaska and crying.

Wish me luck.

Sweet Tea and Cookie's, Ya'll!
Mrs. Belle


Pet Loss

Feeling slightly better today. I still don't feel human, but better.

I've been reading up on grieving over pets and the first step is being honest about your feelings. I feel guilty. Guilty that maybe I should have tried harder, been willing to get a second opinion, spent more, done more, stayed up all night with her more. I feel regretful that I did not do those things. I feel regretful about the decision that I made. I mean yes, I made the decision with the support of the veterinarian and everyone else that knew Alaska. But.. as soon as I said it, I felt my heart break and I immediately wanted to take it back... to beg, barter, borrow, and steal from the Lord for her health.. I feel saddened that she is not here. I feel lonely... she was my constant companion for so long. I feel angry at God that I prayed for her health and he didn't help me. I feel selfish... like I should have done more and didn't because it would inconvenience me. This last one is ridiculous... even as I write it, I know it. If there was ANYTHING I could have done to save her and make her healthy, I would have. I would have done whatever it took, whatever the vet suggested. I feel dirty... because that little dog with the sweet face trusted me so much and I took her trust and had her euthanized.

I knew she was getting sicker. She was losing weight. She was having trouble moving around. She was having trouble finding a way to lay down and get comfortable... even on extraordinary amounts of pain pills. Her little leg was swelling bigger and the infection in her butt was getting worse, regardless of the antibiotics. She would lay awake and whine and cry at night... and I would get up and sit with her. I would pet her little head, or pick her up and put her in her bed if she was laying on the floor. She would look at me with her sweet little face and I would pet her and talk to her until she fell asleep again. I knew it was only a matter of time. I was hoping that she would pass quietly in her sleep one night... at home, in her bed. I thought we could keep her comfortable on pain medicine until her time came.

I was not expecting this trip to the vet to be the last one. I had no idea that this would be the end. I know that all of the resources I've found said not to cry or it might upset your pet... unfortunately though, I could not help myself. Life without my little dog was and is too lonely for me to imagine. She used to follow me around the house and bleat like a little lamb at me. If ever there was another animal that was comparable to Alaska, it was a little white lamb. She was silent, except for her occasional bleating and when she dreamed... she would 'Boof' quietly in her sleep. She had the sweetest face... and eyes that always looked so innocent and trusting.

One of the first times I knew that I desperately loved this little dog  was the first time she did her little trick to get attention. It was right after we picked her up from the Bladen County Shelter. I was sitting on the couch and she came up to my leg and was wagging ecstatically, when I didn't pay her any attention, she sat down and patted me with one small, white furry paw. She would sort of wave it at me and pat me with it. Then, for good measure, she added the other front paw to the mix. So I was getting waved at and gently patted with two small white paws and being smiled at with a toothless little smile. Is it even possible not to love that?

I miss the way she would clean her little face... if ever there was a little dog who was born to be a lady, it was her.

We bonded through her first surgery to remove a bladder stone the size of an orange from her little bladder... and when she recovered, she was a new dog! She would go to the restroom in the mornings and RUN back to the house. Yep, RUN! Run as fast as her little legs would carry her with her little pink tongue hung out of her toothless mouth. Sometimes she would snorful around in the grass and roll around and play and she was so happy.

Then she got bitten by a diseased tick. Ehrlichiosis. Sadly, she never truly recovered. It attached her little aged joints and put her in chronic pain. We put her on pain medicine and physical therapy. We bought orthopedic dog beds for nearly every room in the house, and added a prescription diet.

She had another surgery on her bladder to biopsy it and take a tumor off of her eye. Everything came out normal... but my little dog was still not running and playing. About a month ago, she came down with doggie hemorrhoids, as a result of her being on so much pain medicine and it causing constipation. Also, one of her back legs was swollen. At the vets office, we added antibiotics, a laxative, and a topical spray to her list of medicine. We thought her leg was just fluid build up... more physical therapy was the prescription. I bought her a kiddie pool and a life jacket for her to swim in. She was not a fan of swimming, but she did enjoy laying in the sun to dry off.

Monday I noticed her licking herself a lot... so I took her to the groomer so that she could have her hiney shaved so that I could see what was going on, better apply medicine etc. Once the shaving started, we could tell that it was badly infected AND that she had started chewing on that back leg. So, I knew that the pain meds were not working and that it had been paining her.

So we sat in the waiting room at the vets office. Every time I got up, Alaska would try to head for the door to leave. Maybe she knew... I don't know. When we were called, we went back and sat in the exam room. I thought that they would just give her some stronger medicine... I had no idea that it would be so serious. But, sadly, her temperature was normal... meaning whatever was in her leg causing her pain was likely cancerous. To treat the infection in her hiney, they would have had to put her on something that would hinder her immune system, which would let the cancer run rampant and eat her alive. So it was either treat her hiney and let the cancer eat her, or treat the cancer and let her butt rot out from under her. My heart... broke. Into a million pieces. Here it was... the moment when I knew that I couldn't save her anymore. I couldn't make her happy anymore. I couldn't even keep her comfortable. The vet tried to console me: He told me that I had done more than any other owner that he had ever known. That I had done all that I could.

I signed the paper in a fog. I cried like a baby. I held my little dog and in those last moments, all I could think to tell her was that I am so sorry. The vet asked if I wanted to wait for my husband to get there. I shook when I told him No... to please go ahead and do it before I change my mind. Before I lose my courage. The nurse tried to comfort me... and I tried to be brave so not to upset my Alaska. I couldn't. She watched questioningly when he shaved her front leg for the shot. I pet her head while he started pushing it in. When he started to pull it out, she yelped and bugged her eyes out... like she was in pain or panicked. At the same moment, he said 'She's gone'. My knees came out from under me and I sank to the floor where I continued to rock and cry. To their credit, they did what they needed to do. They removed Alaska in case she made any more noises, took her in the back, closed her eyes, and settled her into her bag and into her box/coffin. They even marked which end was her head. Meanwhile, the nurse came back in and held me while I cried. She told me that Alaska never felt it... that it was just her letting out all the air in her body and that sometimes the way that their muscles contort makes it look painful. I was inconsolable. She told me that I had done all I could do... all that anyone could ever do and offered to carry Alaska out for me. I gave her the keys to my truck and she placed Alaska in the floor right where she had lain so many countless other times we had ridden around.

I barely remember paying the bill. Or the ride home. Or posting it on facebook. Or the family and friends that called. I remember going to buy her headstone... it reads "If love could have saved you, you would have lived forever". Perfect.

We buried her next to CJ under the Bradford Pear tree.

Since then, I have cried. And cried. And cried. I've reached out to people as often as I feel that I can, but more often than not I just want to lay in my bed and be snuggled by Mr. Belle and cry.

Now, I'm sitting her blogging... and crying some more. Today is my 24th birthday and all I want is my little dog back and healthy.

Sweet Tea and Cookie's, Ya'll.
Mrs. Belle


Friday, October 21, 2011

RIP Alaska

Yesterday was a horrible day.  Long story short, I had to make a terrible decision... I had to put Alaska down.

I love that little dog. I doted on her every chance I got and she loved me more than anything else in the world. Even if I was in the restroom, she would come lay in the doorway or lay on the rug outside of my bathtub. She loved to be in my presence and I loved having her with me.

I knew her health was failing... but I really hoped that she was just going to pass in her bed peacefully. No such luck. I was petting her when they gave her the shot and the most awful part? She yelped. The vet said that she never felt it and that she just yelped as a way of letting out air but... I saw her face. She looked like she was in pain. I am devastated that her last conscious thought may have been 'Ouch, that hurts!'.

I'm not going to lie... when she yelped, my knees jello-ed right our from under me and all I could do was sob uncontrollably. There is nothing worse. Ever.

I feel like a murderer. I know that she trusted me and I feel like I betrayed her. She didn't look at peace when they came in... she looked confused.

And yes, people have told me that I did the right thing. My vet told me that I did the right thing. My family, my friends... but it is not consoling me.  To me, it doesn't matter how much time, effort and resources I put into her... it was all for nothing if she thought for one second at the end that I didn't love her. If she thought for one second that I had disappointed her or given up on her, then I did not do my job.

I cried all night. Even with sleep medicine, I couldn't sleep. This morning, my eyes were swollen shut. I feel achy. I have wept all day. Every time I see her empty bed, every time I get up to move and I don't hear her following me. Every time I look outside and see that upturned earth over her grave.

I am just... devastated. My heart is broken. I miss my little dog. I want her back. Even after I told the vet that we would go through with it, I immediately wanted to take it back. I wanted it to not be happening. I was in shock when I signed the paper... I couldn't believe that I was about to do this to my little dog.

She loved me so much and I put her to sleep. People can say it was mercy, or unselfishness, or whatever... at the end of the day, she's still gone and I still ache for her.

I just... can't even write anymore. I can't see the screen because I'm crying so hard.


Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Angels Everywhere?

So, I've decided to toss some religion out there in my blog today. Kinda..

Anyway, I was on a hunt for a long line bra today to wear under my dress for the ball tomorrow and my search landed me at Belk at one point. Well, I was clumsily explaining to the 'fit specialist' in the bra section what I was looking for, and that I would settle for a different undergarment if it would have the same effect. As those of us 'fluffier' women know, trying to explain to another woman about ANYTHING that involves our weight, fat rolls, back fat, etc is hellish and should be used as a form of capital punishment... it ranks up there with some of the most uncomfortable necessary conversations in the world.

So anyway, I'm there talking to this employee and explaining to her my undergarment needs, when another lady stepped up. She had been hovering so that she could ask a question to the employee and happened to overhear my problem and offered up a few suggestions. I think that she realized my mortification, and perhaps noticed the embarrassed flush creeping up my neck (I was not embarrassed that she had heard, just that I was having to have this conversation at all) and she told me that in no way am I fat and that I should embrace myself that I was beautiful. It was such an unexpected, great thing to say at a time when I needed to hear it.

I know that a lot of people tell other people that they are not fat, look great in those pants, etc out of obligation... but this was not it. She was honestly sincere. It was in her eyes... she meant it! She even hugged me and, oddly enough, it made me feel better. It was one of those things where I came home and looked at myself in the mirror and thought "You know what, not so bad...".

So, long story short, angels are everywhere. :)

Sweet Tea and Cookie's, Ya'll!
Mrs. Belle


Monday, October 17, 2011

Weekend Recap: Bachelorette Party/ Family Birthday Party

This weekend went pretty quick... way too quick if you ask me!

Friday night was Courtney's bachelorette party and it was my job as the Matron of Honor to make sure that it was AWESOME! So, we started out the night with a Pure Romance party, 106 Jello shots (22 of which were consumed by yours truly) and friends. A bunch of our sorority sisters were there, and it was a blast! We had the jello shots shaped in penis form, there were penis carrot cake cupcakes (Delish!), penis straws, and penis games. We had Mr. Party Pecker, which consists of a blow up strap on penis and three blow up rings that you attempt to hook him with and Bachelorette dare bingo. At one point, I had to put an ice cube down my pants until it melted... and trust me, it takes longer than one would think! I was adorned with a penis whistle necklace and a penis crown (which I promptly broke trying to put it on my head and the groom to be had to try to patch it together for me) and Courtney had a matching necklace to mine and a penis veil. Since the wedding colors are caribbean blue, pale yellow and white: Courtney wore white, the wedding party wore blue, and the other guests wore yellow. Clever, huh? I thought so. :)

Our Pure Romance rep, Sarah, was great and very patient with me who could not keep my mouth shut to save  myself. If anyone is interested in purchasing any Pure Romance products, let me know and I'll pass you along to Sarah.  This was the only point in the evening when I might have had a slight buzz... I'll touch on this later. I bought a new lubricant called 'Just Like Me' and it is super cool. It's supposed to feel natural and when it dries out, you lick it and it goes right back to being all slippery and wet. I got the blueberry flavor and it is quite tasty. :)

After our rep had packed up and everyone put in their orders, we prepared to go downtown. We started out at a smaller bar, Levels and then moved on to Rehab. Rehab has entertaining bartenders, tasty drinks, three stripper poles, a VIP area, quite a few flat screens, and a large dance floor.

The downside to this whole night? I fear that I am too old to party with my sisters. I drank more than any one person should be able to hold (22 jello shots, a hurricane, a Midori sour, a trash can, a sex on the beach and a red headed slut) and still didn't catch a decent buzz (at no fault of the bartenders, they did NOT skimp me). I really think that it was because I was worried about keeping up with my sisters and the Bride to be. Now, do not misunderstand, I had a great time! I met awesome people, partied with my favorite people, and danced on a stripper pole... does it get better? Not really. But, apparently I am at the age where I would rather sit at the bar and drink and talk to the people around me than go stumble around the dance floor. When did that happen? I've always been a good dancer and dancing is one of my favorite past times... so then when did I start preferring the bar? Then again, it wasn't packed in there so it wasn't like I was dancing for a crowd and I always prefer a performance as opposed to just shaking my rump for myself.

Anywho, then we went to Sup dogs. Now, let me set the scene. It's 2 AM, in this tiny little convenience store-turned-burger stand with like 100 drunk college kids in there and... I HAVE NEVER HAD A BETTER BURGER IN MY LIFE! No, seriously, get in your car, grab a few bucks, and drive to Greenville, NC to Sup Dogs. I ordered some kind of western cheese burger will grilled onions and bacon. The bacon was like Canadian bacon, the onions were perfect and the burger was messy and AMAZING. It was one of those burgers that was greasy and awesome in the kind of way that you never want it to end! Note: Not greasy like McD's where you kind of grimace at it... no, the kind of messy where you are just enthralled by it and you want to eat them until you cannot breathe and they stop your heart. It is THAT good. It will change your life. Yes. Change. Your. Life! And no, it wasn't the alcohol talking... sadly, as much as I had drank, at this point I was stone cold sober. It's not just 'drunk food'... its awesome, all the time, every day possible food.

We finally all made it home at roughly 3:30 AM. I crashed on the extremely drunk Bride-to-Be's couch and preceded to be tortured by her cats... who I'm am now certain are sleep deprivation terrorists. Little bastards. Cute, Furry, little bastards.

Saturday morning, specifically the ride home, was a blur for me. From home, we headed down to my grandmothers house with our four dogs in tow. Our first stop was in New Bern at the Petsmart (Very friendly staff!) and our dogs were a huge hit. Midas, my large and loveable golden Siberian Husky ate his weight in treats. Fry had never traveled like this, nor had he ever ridden in a shopping cart... or had so much attention paid to him. He handled it all very well... and loved every second! Bella, however, was disgruntled that she was in a cart with Fry and he was touching her... she's a brat like that... just like me, LOL! Bella actually prompted this stop. When we were on our way down 70, we passed the exit to my Dad's house and I asked Bella 'Do you wanna see Grand Dad?' and she cocked her little head to one side and smiled this big smile. I just said "well, that settles it' and I called my Dad to meet us in New Bern so that his Grand-Dog could see him. Who are these idiots that say that dogs don't have feelings?

We also stopped and purchased an XM radio... all I can say is 'How have I lived my life this long without one?'. I would also like to say that it has a Playboy talk channel that is not awesome. It's just... corny. You are more likely to laugh at it than be turned on.

We made it down to my Grandmothers where we spent the remainder of the weekend. Sunday we had a turkey dinner in honor of mine and my grand mothers combined birthdays. I got a few great gifts and got to spend some great time with my family.

Now, if I could just get rid of this head cold, I would be all set!


Monday, October 10, 2011


As some of you know from my previous posts, Sgt. Belle and I just celebrated our 3 year anniversary. May I just say that even though it seems like these three years have flown by, I cannot tell you how much I have grown in that time. When I think of all of the things that I have known, not known, thought I knew, changed my mind about, and learned... it's like we've already lived a lifetime and we have a life time to go.

My favorite quote about marriage is one that I came up with on my own for a friend of mine: "There is no one you will love or hate as much as your spouse and there is nothing as ridiculous, or as wonderful, as being married." That, to me, encompasses most of everything that there is to know about marriage.

As much as I wish that it was a fairy tale and as much as I DREAMED of a fairy tale marriage... I am devastated to tell you, my readers, that there is no fairy tale. Tragic right? How am I supposed to be a Princess (as my Daddy always told me that I am) if there is not Friggin' fairy tale?

Answer: Very carefully ;)... but I digress.

Marriage takes work. It doesn't take work for me to love my husband... that comes naturally. I just DO love it. I do not have to try. It does take work to find compromises. It takes work to reign in my temper. It takes work to pick my battles and to overlook the little things in favor of a more peaceful household. And, most of all, it takes a lot of work to make MYSELF a better person, for both me and him.

Another tragic fact: it is not always the spouses fault. Nope. Sometimes it's your fault. Sorry to break that to you (theoretical/hypothetical you, of course) but sometimes it is YOUR fault. We all like to think that it is never our faults... I HATE when it's my fault. But sometimes it is. Sometimes, the fight is my fault and all I can do (when I realize it... because most of the time I don't realize that it's my fault until somewhere near Armageddon) is apologize. Sometimes it's his fault... and I either forgive him or he pays hell, depending on the crime. Sometimes, it's just the Cosmos. The zipper on my favorite dress ripping while A) I am wearing the dress and B) He is zipping the dress. I'm mad because my dress is ripped. He's mad because that means that I have to change and it makes us late. Whose fault? Cosmos. Did I intend to get a dress that's a little snug, No.. (well, sometimes... but that's a different story). Did he mean to go he-man and hulk up on my poor zipper and rip it from my body? Probably not. Is God sitting up there smiling about it? Yes, I do think he is. I think that God finds amusement in my life and that I am a constant form of comedic relief. Long story short, learn to roll with the punches and do not immediately point fingers at your significant other when things go wrong... Sometimes, (pardon my french) but shit just happens. Often, they are just as annoyed as you and you leaping at them with guns ablaze will likely just turn a ridiculous situation into a war.

My Grandmother gave me great marriage advice. She said that marriage is all about lines in the sand. She told me that I would spend a lot of time with a stick in my hand... sometimes I'll be drawing lines for him not to cross, sometimes I'll be adjusting or moving lines for him not to cross, sometimes I'll be erasing lines that I no longer care if he crosses, and other times I will be using the stick to whack him for crossing said lines.... and that he would be doing the same for me.

Smart woman.

So, some sage, late night advice on marriage. :)

Sweet Tea and Cookie's Ya'll!
Mrs. Belle


How to know if your significant other is a loser...

So, Lately my friends have been dating *GASP*... well... losers. I, though normally chomping at the bit to give my opinion, I am loath to hurt their feelings.

So. Here we go.

How to tell that you are dating a loser.

1) If they are perfectly okay putting an addiction of any kind before you. I understand that there are people who are battling their addictions and blah blah blah... well, if they are okay putting their pills, alcohol, gambling, hooker addictions etc ahead of your, your feelings, and your well being then he/she is a LOSER. Rule #1: You should always come conditionally first to your significant other... or, that's right, they are LOSERS. In that case, find someone else. There are MILLIONS of other people who are not addicted to illegal (or legal) substances who would love to have a decent person to love. Perhaps you can bond over the losers that you used to date...

2) If they have a criminal record, full of things that should never have happened and the only thing longer than their record is their list of excuses, you, my friend, are dating a loser. The only thing worse than dating a criminal (of any kind), is dating a criminal that refuses to take responsibility of their criminal actions. No, Eminem did not make you jack a car... and no, you're imperfect Mama did not cause you to steal at TV... and no, alcohol did not MAKE you stab someone in a bar. We blame our actions on other people in Kindergarden. Now, we take responsibility for our actions.

3) If they have several children by several different partners and do not care for them. Yeah, common sense. Multiple children with multiple partners and then shunning the responsibility of said children... LOSER!

4) If they CONSTANTLY use you for money, rides, sex, etc... LOSER!

5) If they have trouble being faithful... LOSER!

6) If you find out on accident that they have an STD... and didn't tell you. LOSER!

7) If they treat their parents like crap (without reason... but even with reason, can't we all just be coolly polite? Or even haughty sociable?).... LOSER!

8) If they pretend to be smarter than they are because they dropped out of high school and then watch shows like 'Burn Notice' and try to convince those around them of their 'deep thoughts', 'philosophies', and 'intelligence'. Coughcough LOSER coughcough!

9) If they are constantly trying to one up people with LIES about things that they wish that they did. We all know someone like that... the one that if you successfully cook a steak on your grill, then they've (supposedly) studied culinary arts under a french chef... only then you find out that they really didn't and that they lied about the whole thing to steal your thunder. Why would they do that? Because they are a LOSER!

10) If they lay their hands on you in anger and violence, you are dating a loser... and a loser that deserves to be in jail. Do NOT be so hungry for love that you allow someone to beat, assault, molest, rape, or demean you in any way. This goes both ways... There are men that allow their women to hit them because they think 'it's okay for women to hit men but I can't hit her back because it's not okay for men to hit women'. No. It is not okay for anyone to hit anyone. Ever. It is abuse and detrimental to your physical, emotional, and mental health. Do not allow yourself to fall into this category and if you already fall into this category, get in touch with me. I will tell you how to get out of it. I will explain to you in detail why it is not okay... why you do not deserve to be tortured in the name of love.

As always, my wonderful readers, I write because I care. I truly believe that there is someone out there for everyone. There is someone out there who will love and cherish you for you without you having to jump through flaming hoops or dodge drunken fists. Believe that you are more valuable than that. Have some faith in yourself and your worth.

Sweet Tea and Cookie's Ya'll!
Mrs. Belle


In a Funk and Recap.

I admit it. I've been being slack.

I could have updated my blog a hundred times and I just haven't yet... I just haven't feel like it. And, you know, I really hate when something I love turns into a chore...

At any rate, the husband is home (Yay!). He has his welcome home/birthday party and all was well. He took this last week off of work and we spent it together working on our house. The bathroom is still not remodeled (or fixed) from the storm damage (DAMMMMMIIITTT!!!!) but he says that he will need help to do it. But, we did get a lot of other things done, even if none of them were the 'Big' deal.

Let's focus on what we DID do (I need some positivity).
Inside the house:
*We replaced blinds all over the house from where the dogs had ruined them at some point or another.
*We bought a king sized bed and re-arranged and redecorated our two bedrooms in our house... and bought new bedding. This bed... HUGE. The jury is still out on whether or not it's awesome.
*We put up a few new pictures that we bought.
*We bought new scarves/curtains and put them up.
*We started the long, drawn out process of getting his Army Dress Blues ready for my friends wedding and the Cannon Ball (ECU's homecoming ball).
*I held my friends Bridal Shower here.

 *We bought a new lawnmower and regained control over the jungle that was our yard. 
*We planted my potted plants that needed to be put in the ground before the first freeze.
*We burned all the debris from the storm in one big bonfire (Yay, Pyro-Hubby!)
*We put up our fall decorations.  So cute... will post pictures later.
*We landscaped around the remaining two trees in our yard (we did the last two a while back).
*We reinforced the rafters  in the garage for more storage.
*We started framing for the concrete slab that will extend the garage.
*We bought the concrete for the slab.

We also celebrated our 3rd anniversary! Yay! Go us!

Since he's been home, I've been uncharacteristically clingy. Perhaps it has to do with the fact that I was unbearably lonely while he was gone for training. Perhaps it's because I know he's looking for an overseas contracting job that will take him away for a year... and even without the odds of a contracting job, I'm sure there will be a deployment rearing it's ugly head soon enough. At any rate, I'm really glad that he is home and I'm going to enjoy my time with him.

Aside from the updates, I'm kind of in a creative slump. If you have any suggestions of topics, etc, let me know!

Until Later, dearests!

Sweet Tea and Cookies Ya'll,
Mrs. Belle